“Sometimes I make a big deal out of something that doesn’t require so much ‘deal’.  I think that might be happening already with this whole “starting a diet” thing.” – Those are the first words I typed in composing this post…self-sabotage at its finest

I have yet to weigh myself or take ‘before’ pictures or do any of my measurements.  I am working on a food plan – but find myself thinking, “this is so much work just to feed myself, and (fingers crossed) Preston, he’ll likely refuse to eat much of the stuff I will make and go on hunger strike”.  It feels like so much energy into this one thing (this one thing that will ultimately save my life – no big deal).  It makes me want to just start this whole thing and shoot from the hip…

I recognize this is one of my minds most clever tricks.  Its trying to force me to put in minimal effort so that when (need to change the mindset to “IF”) I fail, I don’t feel like one of my good plans failed along with all of my bad ones – and this time I feel like I’m onto a good plan (the actual planning, and blogging and sharing plan)!  I convince myself that I know how to eat between 1200 and 1600 calories/day without planning; I know how to exercise and what kind of exercises will encourage weight loss; I know how to avoid triggers all because I have done this before.  I was successful before.  But it’s a trick!  Maybe since I have done this before I want the planning to go more quickly or more effortlessly, but I didn’t keep the weight off, and over the past 7 years I have lost and regained the same 20/30lbs so many times its absurd.  The mind tricks are the worst in self-sabotage.

My mind tricks are so powerful that I almost agreed to this one and thought about blogging how I was ready to just get going already and the meal plans could wait!  What a frustrating situation I would find myself in two weeks from now.  Already I am feeling the benefit of this blogging thing – it helped me realize how closely I have to monitor what is going on inside my head.  That’s such a huge part of this battle!!

So, be gone poor planning thoughts!!!  I see you and hear you but you aren’t getting a foothold today!  I will continue to invest in my meal planning and organizing in preparation for this Sunday’s take off day.

As soon as I typed those words I thought – “just because I’m planning doesn’t mean I will be successful…”  Maybe not, but my awareness and dismissal of those thoughts will!